Valentine’s Day Is A Joke

Anyone who knows me knows that I have opinions on…well…everything, and sometimes a little feisty when I feel like it. Hey, I can own it.

What I am not, is a sucker for advertising or marketing scams or a blind follower of social “rules”. With that being said, I will let you in on a little secret: I’m also a romantic.

And that, my friends, is why I think Valentine’s Day is a fool’s “holiday” and a total waste of the concept of a “special” day.

Any day can be Valentine's Day if you make the effort
Corporations want you to believe that Valentine’s Day is about love & romance. That’s only so they can get your money.

Just as a disclaimer,  I feel the same way even when I do have someone in my life at this time of the year so it’s not that I’m being bitter at being single!

Why would a supposed romantic be against the concept of Valentine’s Day? The reasons are simple, yet many.

It takes more than flowers to make women happy

The first thing I hate about this supposed holiday is how, counter to the popular saying “money can’t buy love”, everything about celebrating the day revolve around buying gifts. The overriding message is you can win your lady’s heart with jewelry or cars.

Hell, Jennifer Lopez had the balls to write a song called “Love Don’t Cost a Thing”… I wonder what would happen if her boyfriend/husband just gave her a card with a balloon and a rose.

That leads into the next thing I can’t stand: the blatant hypocrisy  For so long women have fought to have the same rights as men on every level. Then, why do so many of them sit back and accept the shit put out there by all of the money-makers that the man should be showering the woman with gifts? Where are the commercials of the women giving the men a fancy new Breitling or a car?  And where are all the women’s groups protesting now!?

And why are past acts of douchery seemingly forgiven? It’s like a guy or girl can be a neglectful asshole or bitch for 364 days, but if they go out of their way to do something special on this one day…BAM!… all is magically forgiven. Or at least that’s how it appears to work.

It’s not just the money, or social issues that annoy me, it’s the core relationship stuff more than anything.

I have a hard time wrapping my head around why there is so much fuss over this particular day and the things it represents:

Why can’t any random day be special? What’s wrong with March 17? Or August 8th? Or better yet…

Why is it a once a year thing for so many people? Having a special date night each month or even each week set aside is too much hassle perhaps?

You can’t tell someone you love them every day and have it mean as much or more?

Proposing or getting married on February 14th isn’t even romantic. It’s lame, predictable and overdone.

Don’t you want your partner to know that they’re special and loved all the time?

Wouldn’t you want to know that you are occupying someone else’s thoughts at random times, not just a day when t’s forced upon them?

Seriously, since when is actually caring for someone with all of your heart not enough? No, now it’s like we’re being told that if you don’t go out and buy fancy jewelry or even a car that you really don’t care as much as you could f you did those things.

While I’m a big fan of doing things “just because”, wouldn’t this grand gesture day be better suited happening on a day that actually means something like the day you first met, or commemorating the first date rather than a day that really has no meaning and when everyone else is doing something similar?

I’m not against romance, quite the opposite in fact. I’m for genuine romance. The kind that is spontaneous. The kind that comes from the heart, not from marketers. The kind of genuine romance that leaves someone at a loss for words. Not this commercialized, manufactured, nonsensical crap.

  • Brick By Brick Investing

    PREACH!!!! This needs to be screamed from the rooftops. I’m so lucky to have my wife because she understands that valentine’s day is a farce and I have to admit it is quite amusing when I see her go on her rants about women who are suckers for an action a guy does on one day out of the year. I believe her best line yet was “Screw the other 364 days out of the year, if he can bring his A game on Feb 14 he’s a keeper!” ;-)

    • Eric J. Nisall – DollarVersity

      Yeah, that’s really sad. I’d love to hear what people who think like that say on Feb. 15th when they start getting neglected or mistreated again! This is why I don’t mind being single at this time of the year. Between Valentine’s and New Years, people get nuts.

  • Eric J. Nisall – DollarVersity

    Woo hoo! I didn’t get bashed by the first female comment! I really think it’s ok to go celebrate in a low-key way like going out to dinner, but when huge productions are made on a day like this rather than a birthday or anniversary of something meaningful it seems comical to me.

  • writeyourownreality

    Phenomenal! Couldn’t agree more. I affectionately refer to it as the Hallmark Holiday; no one really benefits in the long-term more than Hallmark.

    “Proposing or getting married on February 14th isn’t even romantic. It’s lame, predictable and overdone.” ~ Couldn’t agree any more… I mean who needs originality? Might be interpreted as developing a vested interest…

    • Eric J. Nisall – DollarVersity

      Some people just don’t have it in them to think for themselves. Just like all of the people who signed up to get married on 11-11-11 and 12-12-12, like those days had any significance to the relationships.

  • FrugalPortland

    Agree wholeheartedly! It’s a day for kids.

    • Eric J. Nisall – DollarVersity

      Don’t forget gullible suckers!

  • krantcents

    I agree! My wife and I do our own thing. The real problem is the spouse or girlfriend not getting something at work or they can talk about at work. Not having that make that person feel like a loser. If the couple agree not to celebrate Valentine’s Day and do something all the time , then it can work.

    • Eric J. Nisall – DollarVersity

      Anyone who cares about what others say or think might deserve to feel like a loser in my opinion. It always bugs me that some random day has more importance than a relevant day like an anniversary in so many instances. I lean completely toward the practice of doing things all during the year rather than trying to make one meaningless day bear all of the importance.

  • Andrea Whitmer

    I like the idea of a card on Valentine’s Day (which was also my request for every other holiday when I was in a relationship), but I’ve never understood people who expect gifts, dinner, and a red carpet for every random date on a calendar. Love this post – lots of common sense here.

    • Eric J. Nisall – DollarVersity

      Every once in a while, I get lucky and all of the rambling comes together in a coherent masterpiece!

  • Grayson @ Debt Roundup

    This one made me laugh. I feel the same way. I have never liked the day. It is just like Christmas, all about gifts.

    • Eric J. Nisall – DollarVersity

      Well, at least for some people, Christmas is about family and they attend church. But in my opinion, all holidays are garbage. Think about it, how the hell can Memorial Day be about partying it up on the beach when the intent is to celebrate those who gave their lives for our freedoms. t’s not like anyone is out there saying “Hey this round is dedicated to those brave folks who enabled us to act like fools out here!”

  • John Wedding

    So, dare I even ask how your Valentine’s Day was? :)

    • Eric J. Nisall – DollarVersity

      I spent 12 hours at work, so I didn’t have much time to think about it much.